The Mark Hughes Diaries

Mark Hughes is an admired ex-pro, whose playing career spanned over 20 years with over 600 league appearances and 163 league goals to his name, turning out for some of Europe`s greatest teams including Manchester United, Barcelona, Bayern Munich and Chelsea. The former Welsh international moved into management following his retirement and having managed Blackburn, Manchester City and Fulham, the 48-year-old now sits at the helm of Queens Park Rangers. Vital QPR proudly has exclusive access to his weekly diary and will give you an interesting and reflective insight into the goings on at QPR.

5th November 2012

'FOOTBALL clichés are often thrown around without much thought, however no truism to describe our predicament is more apt than the term 'we`re screwed`. I irresponsibly forecasted a relegation battle-free season at the end of the last campaign; at the time I did think it was potentially ambitious but I certainly didn`t envisage a winless first ten games. I`m not sure if you`ve heard but despite our small quandary I am still very confident we can turn things around. Tony is as well, if you didn`t know.

We feel as if we`ve got our tactics spot on the past few weeks and instead spent the week finding ways of hopefully changing our luck. Switching Cisse`s hair dye in the shower while he wasn`t looking brought him his first goal of the season; however Cesar`s decision to wear his misses` lucky tights unfortunately didn`t bring him a clean sheet. The decision to let the Tiger Cubs celebrate their 4th birthday on the pitch during half-time was somewhat inspirational to the lads - Jamie Mackie said he`d copy one of the young child`s admirable celebration if he scored in the second half.

We have been linked with a return bid for Christopher Samba during the January transfer window, though our funds are not as healthy as some make out. Shipping out an extortionate amount into Bosingwa`s bank account each week to swan about the pitch for 90 minutes attempting what can only be described as a pitiable excuse of crossing and defending isn`t as cost effective as people believe. Bobby Zamora has admitted he doesn`t enjoy watching football - this may be because he somehow managed to get his hands on a slideshow of QPR`s away day trips since I took over.

We turn our attentions to our game against Stoke next week. Rugby caps and emergency medical team at the ready, we are focused on getting that first win that so many of you are gagging for. Just remember to take a leaf out of my book and separate your personal life from your professional one - admittedly I should probably spend a bit more time focused on my professional one at the moment.`

Vital QPR would like to notify all readers at this point, that in no way is Mark Hughes associated with this website. The opinions stated above are merely for the purposes of entertainment and have absolutely no connection to the beliefs or views of the QPR manager. We hope.

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